I was really good at making up excuses for what was going on in my house. I was never the type in the past that would take credit for my mistakes. I always blaned it on someone or something else. I catch myself doing still sometimes and quickly try to correct myself.
The first time he hurt me, I mean when he choked me out, the next day I made excuses for him and forgave him like an idiot.. the next time when he hit me, threw me out of a moving truck and threatened to kill me I again made up stupid excuses partially blaming myself for his actions. I again forgave..
I packed up and left him because he wasn't holding up his end of the bargain, no drugs or alcohol amd getting help. . He still hasn't forgave me. He still calls me names and manipulates me, he tricks me, he uses our kids against me for his gain.. and he expects me to respect him and cower to him.. I don't know what world he is living in because I am a changed girl!
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